Our Fear of Change

Do you sometimes find yourself wondering how you ever ended up here?  Could you have done better?  Might things have been different, if only…the thoughts begin swirling around in your mind and soon you are second guessing the way your life has turned out. 

We all face moments of doubt; moments when we feel as though we’ve diverged from our path.  One morning we might wake up only to realize that we are in the midst of a journey we never should have been on in the first place.  In our moments of doubt we feel vulnerable; uncertain and insecure about where we are, wondering where it all might have went wrong…and it paralyzes us.

We’re afraid to change.  Not because we don’t want to change but because change is uncomfortable.  Finding the courage to make a major life-altering change is like trying to find the cojones to ask out the prettiest girl in school.  As much as you want to go on a date with her, it’s practically impossible to work up the nerve to introduce yourself (while not making a complete ass of yourself in the process).  The same is true for changing your life.  It is hard, it will be scary and you may even question your sanity at times.

Day after day we go through the motions of life.  We know something in our life isn’t right and despite our recognition that something is amiss, we shield ourselves from the truth. We try hiding behind the little lies we all tell ourselves; that things will get better, that he will change, that I’ll be promoted if only I work more hours…

We tell ourselves these things because we’re afraid to say “Screw it!”

We’re scared to quit, to cut our losses and move on to something else.  Afterall, we’ve invested so much time, money and effort into it that moving on would mean all our energy has been for naught.  So a relationship that has long ago soured lingers only because of the fond memories you once shared.  A bad investment stays in your portfolio because you can’t bear to take a loss, all the while its value continues to plummet.  And that degree in computer science that promised riches…well, rich you may be but happy you are not.

We must overcome the fears that strangle our dreams.  It’s time to be honest with yourself, say “Screw it!” and move forward.  Things change, people change, values change, beliefs change.  Life is dynamic.  Embrace change with an open heart.  The time, energy and money are all gone.  You will never be able to get them back.  So ask yourself, is it really worth it to invest more into this or are you just beating a dead horse?

We’ve all heard the stories of people who find themselves on the verge of death only to come back a changed person.  They quit their jobs, divorce their husband and chase after their passions.  These people aren’t crazy.  They get it!  They understand that this life is all they are ever promised and even a moment of dissatisfaction is a moment too many.  Don’t go another day questioning your life.  Change it!  You might not be so lucky as to have a second chance to get things right.

Find your happiness.

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