Welcome to Hundred Goals! I’m Steven.
When I first began blogging, I introduced myself to the world with a story of drugs, drinking and going to jail. As time goes on, I’m less able to identify with that autobiography.
Rather than describing who I was, I wrote about who I wasn’t. Doing this was an attempt to separate myself from a time in my life that I was ashamed of. But by defining myself as the foil of my former self, rather than dissociating from the past, I only strengthened that connection. Just as there needs to be a Heaven for there to be a Hell, without that connection to the past, I wouldn’t be me.
I refuse to continue defining myself by the mistakes of my past … but now I’m left wondering, “Who am I?”
As I ponder this question, the less I feel any type of description would be adequate. Whatever I’d write would undoubtedly be irrelevant only moments later, for life is dynamic and change is the only thing that’s certain. I cannot define myself by my actions, my interests, my travels, or by the things I own. It’s true that these things might begin to paint a picture of my life, but they fail to explain the person I am. I’m more than the sum of my actions. But who? And who are you?
“Without goals, you are living reactively, letting life push you around. With goals, you can live a proactive life, steering toward a destination. You know where your path is supposed to lead.” ~ J.D. Roth
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