Wants Versus Wishes

Everything you have in life is because you wanted it. The things you own, the people you surround yourself with and the things you do each day are all your creation. Your decision to want that in your life.

You keep what you want, ignore or remove what you don’t.

You might hate your job but the truth is, you don’t want to leave because you’re afraid of the unknown. You want the comfort of knowing what comes tomorrow.

Your relationship might’ve been over a long time ago but you don’t want to leave because you don’t want to be alone. There is safety in pairs.

You’re always broke and never able to get ahead but you don’t want to work another job to make more money. You can’t afford that new purse but you want it, so you put it on your credit card.

You don’t want to leave your job. You don’t want to find someone new (or be alone.) You don’t want to have money in the bank.

You don’t want to be active. You don’t want to be skinny.

You don’t want to travel the world.

You don’t want to learn how to speak Italian.

You might think you want these things. But you don’t.

You don’t want any of it.

But you wish you did.

And there’s a difference between wanting something and wishing for something.

If you want something, you’ll make it happen. You’re willing to sacrifice whatever you need in order to have the things you want in life. If you hate your job, you’re willing to risk opening the door into the unknown to find work that’s rewarding.

If you’re not happy in your relationship, you might wish things were different. But if you want them to be different, then you’ll do whatever it takes to try to fix what’s broken or have the courage to leave and be alone.

If you don’t want to be broke anymore, you’ll find a way to get out of debt and start saving money. You’ll quit spending money on shit you don’t need. You’ll pick up extra hours at work or find another job. Maybe you’ll start a side hustle to earn extra money.

If you want to travel the world but you’re not traveling the world, you don’t really want to. You’re just wishing.

You don’t want to be fit and healthy. You’re just wishing.

It’s time for you to stop wishing and start wanting. Want it bad enough to make it happen.

Wanting without action is still wishing.

Don’t wish your life away.

Dealing with Doubters, Haters & Critics

There’s something magical about having a dream…

A dream of going to medical school … or of running away to join the Peace Corps.

When we think of our dreams, we lapse into a frame of mind in which we believe anything is possible. The opportunities seem endless. A flood of joy washes over us as we envision our future successes and we feel compelled to share our dreams with the world.

But when we do, we’re bound to be met with doubt and criticism … even hate.

The Doubters. There will always be people who tell you you’re not being reasonable and proceed to point out all of the ways you might fail.

Most of these people mean well in their warnings and only want the very best for you. They’re the people who love you most. But they don’t understand why you’d want to sacrifice the safety and security of the familiar in order to chase a dream they consider impractical. “Look at your cousin,” they say. “She’s successful. She has a good job, a nice house, a great husband and cute kids.” In their opinion, it’s better to be safe than sorry. It’s not their intent to stifle your ambitions, they’re just uncertain and worried about you.

It’s not easy having your ambitions dashed by the people who you need most to believe in you. Don’t get discouraged by their lack of enthusiasm. Consider and respect their opinions (their advice is sincere and valuable) but don’t let their doubt create doubt in your heart.

Always believe in yourself.

There is no great genius without some touch of madness. ~ Seneca

The Haters. Haters gonna hate. Fuck ’em.

To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. ~ E. Hubbard

The Critics. When you’re criticized, it might feel like you’re under attack. Instead of feeling defensive, embrace your critics. You should invite constructive criticism and accept their opinions with an open mind. If all you ever receive are insincere accolades, where’s the motivation to improve?  Your critics can offer valuable insight and provide new perspectives you hadn’t considered before. It allows an opportunity to learn and grow.

As much as we thirst for approval we dread condemnation. ~ H. Selye

Most people want you to succeed. Those with reservations about your dreams simply lack the courage to do what you’re going to do. People who offer sincere and constructive criticism only want the best for you … and the best from you.

Few people hope for you to fail. Those who do aren’t worth your attention. Ignore them. There are plenty of people who will support your dreams. Surround yourself with these people and set the world on fire!