Author Archives: Steven

The Secret to Success

13 August 2012

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What’s it mean to be successful?

Society would have us believe the epitome of success is earning lots of money, living in a big house, and driving a fancy car. Many people chase after these things only to find that once they have them, their lives are still missing something. In the eyes of the world they’re seen as a success, yet they feel empty; all of their accomplishments seem inconsequential. Their hearts are left aching for something more meaningful.

They followed the course they thought would bring them happiness and success. They have a “good” job and a retirement plan; each year they take a vacation to another island in the Caribbean. But still they’re disappointed with the way their lives have turned out.

Why?

Because they sacrificed their passion for prestige. Their love, for money. Their life ambition, for acclaim.

Forget about money and fame. They have nothing to do with living a successful life. Success, as defined by John Wooden, is:

“…peace of mind attained only through self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do the best of which you’re capable.”

But not only must you do the best of which you’re capable, you have to define exactly what success means to you (it’s something different for each of us), then follow that path with ruthless intention. You might win the admiration of others by conforming to someone else’s standard of success, but you certainly won’t find peace of mind.

What you want to do with your life might be different from what everyone else is doing. That’s okay. Allow yourself to escape from the expectations of the world in order to create a life that’s right for you. If you’re not interested in going to college, getting married or having children, don’t go, don’t do it, and don’t have any. Chase your dreams and live on your own terms! This is your one and only chance at life; don’t let your direction be guided by anyone else. Listen to your heart, follow your passions and be true to yourself.

That’s the secret to success.

Dealing with Doubters, Haters & Critics

6 August 2012

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There’s something magical about having a dream…

A dream of going to medical school … or of running away to join the Peace Corps.

When we think of our dreams, we lapse into a frame of mind in which we believe anything is possible. The opportunities seem endless. A flood of joy washes over us as we envision our future successes and we feel compelled to share our dreams with the world.

But when we do, we’re bound to be met with doubt and criticism … even hate.

The Doubters. There will always be people who tell you you’re not being reasonable and proceed to point out all of the ways you might fail.

Most of these people mean well in their warnings and only want the very best for you. They’re the people who love you most. But they don’t understand why you’d want to sacrifice the safety and security of the familiar in order to chase a dream they consider impractical. “Look at your cousin,” they say. “She’s successful. She has a good job, a nice house, a great husband and cute kids.” In their opinion, it’s better to be safe than sorry. It’s not their intent to stifle your ambitions, they’re just uncertain and worried about you.

It’s not easy having your ambitions dashed by the people who you need most to believe in you. Don’t get discouraged by their lack of enthusiasm. Consider and respect their opinions (their advice is sincere and valuable) but don’t let their doubt create doubt in your heart.

Always believe in yourself.

There is no great genius without some touch of madness. ~ Seneca

The Haters. Haters gonna hate. Fuck ’em.

To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing. ~ E. Hubbard

The Critics. When you’re criticized, it might feel like you’re under attack. Instead of feeling defensive, embrace your critics. You should invite constructive criticism and accept their opinions with an open mind. If all you ever receive are insincere accolades, where’s the motivation to improve?  Your critics can offer valuable insight and provide new perspectives you hadn’t considered before. It allows an opportunity to learn and grow.

As much as we thirst for approval we dread condemnation. ~ H. Selye

Most people want you to succeed. Those with reservations about your dreams simply lack the courage to do what you’re going to do. People who offer sincere and constructive criticism only want the best for you … and the best from you.

Few people hope for you to fail. Those who do aren’t worth your attention. Ignore them. There are plenty of people who will support your dreams. Surround yourself with these people and set the world on fire!

Ten Easy Ways to Change Your Life Today

1 August 2012

When it comes to changing our lives, so much of the advice given is focused on the future. Often, these changes can be imperceptibly slow and seem delayed indefinitely, leaving us feeling as though nothing will ever be different. And while major life changes require lots of time and effort, concentrating all of our attention on how we want our lives to be someday does little to affect our lives today.

If you want to improve your life today, here are ten simple things you can do that will have an immediate impact:

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